2011-12 Season
Oh Deer! What a calamity as Young Guns whack elderly ‘Chels
It had all started so well. We weren’t playing the mighty BA after all, Tweaky B had run out of poor jokes, and as the squad assembled in the dressing room they were greeted by the return of Lord Volkmar on a flying weekend visit from Germany. The Munich Marvel was back and we welcomed the return of the master of the (goose) step-over.
‘Chels romp to victory despite keeper famine
As Peter, Paul and Mary would have sang – if Mary hadn’t behaved like a typical girl, putting her foot down and insisting on involving flowers – “Where have all the Keepers gone?” A grand total of five Chels’ keepers had been struck down.
You don’t win nuffink with kids – but you can manage a draw!
EP had called for a supreme effort today in a bid to beat our arch-rivals Brentham for the first time in absolute ages. A full squad was called up including a couple of the youth team – Phil and Little Tone both marginally under age and Martin, quite a few years off being able to claim to be a vet!
Village People give ‘Chels a proper seeing to…
New opposition for the ‘Chels today was uncovered by an EP-Newbod attack on the FA’s Observer’s Book of Aged Football Teams. Today’s offering was the Village Vets – although the village in question was unspecified, judging by the look of one or two of them it might have been Royston Vasey where they apparently have a local team for local people.
Second half battling gets ‘Chels off the Hook
Today the kit came neatly wrapped – shirts, shorts and socks all neatly packaged in their own little plastic bags courtesy of Stevie B. We were all greatly impressed with this touch of orderliness – which makes a change from the usual shambles we see out on the pitch.
