2011-12 Season
‘Chels romp to victory despite keeper famine
As Peter, Paul and Mary would have sang – if Mary hadn’t behaved like a typical girl, putting her foot down and insisting on involving flowers – “Where have all the Keepers gone?” A grand total of five Chels’ keepers had been struck down.
You don’t win nuffink with kids – but you can manage a draw!
EP had called for a supreme effort today in a bid to beat our arch-rivals Brentham for the first time in absolute ages. A full squad was called up including a couple of the youth team – Phil and Little Tone both marginally under age and Martin, quite a few years off being able to claim to be a vet!
Village People give ‘Chels a proper seeing to…
New opposition for the ‘Chels today was uncovered by an EP-Newbod attack on the FA’s Observer’s Book of Aged Football Teams. Today’s offering was the Village Vets – although the village in question was unspecified, judging by the look of one or two of them it might have been Royston Vasey where they apparently have a local team for local people.
Second half battling gets ‘Chels off the Hook
Today the kit came neatly wrapped – shirts, shorts and socks all neatly packaged in their own little plastic bags courtesy of Stevie B. We were all greatly impressed with this touch of orderliness – which makes a change from the usual shambles we see out on the pitch.
‘Chels bounce back and that’s a fact
Your intrepid match reporter El Tel is back form trekking in the Patagonian wilderness, a trip that incorporated two days in Buenos Aires where he visited the Boca Juniors stadium. This pretty, compact stadium is known locally as La Bombonera which translates as The Chocolate Box. If the ‘Chels had a similar stadium, no doubt given the gluttonous nature of certain players (no names, no pack drill – you know who you are) it would be known as The Empty Chocolate Box.
