2011-12 Season

‘Chels rock on with a ten-goal frenzy

Another Sunday, another strong performance and another decisive victory for Kenchels as JamRock were given a lesson in finishing (OK – wait for it) at an unseasonally warm and sunny Duke’s Meadows yesterday.

For once we were fielding a reduced squad, and for the first twenty minutes of the game it looked as though we would be in for a tough examination. JamRock had some young and tricky players, and played the ball round well. But they obviously don’t play together regularly and looked particularly suspect at the back.

And although they weren’t fielding the keeper who had presented us with a couple of goals in the early season encounter, his replacement proved to be similarly vulnerable – in stark contrast to the ageless Tommy T, who repelled most of what was thrown (and kicked) at him in a solid display of keeping characterised by equal parts good positioning and toothless grinning.

We lined up with the said TT in goal, a back four of Tom B, Wayne, Tony and Corie, a midfield of Martin, EP, Tias and Marc, with Phil (TNA) partnering Alex (TOA aka TNT) up front. The returning Mrs Murphy started on the bench, but was soon called into action to replace an injured JamRocker.

After an early exchange of goals, TNA decided to make a decisive intervention and a first half hat-trick, supplemented by splendid strikes by father (Tom B) and son (Tias B), left us, to something of our own surprise, 5-1 up at half-time. JamRock were rocked.

In the second half, we spread the jam on the cake. After a bit of re-shuffling at half-time, the main upshot of which was Mrs M coming on for the injured Marc, the ‘Chels accelerated over the horizon. Further goals from Marc, TNA and TOA were left in the shade by two excellent further goals from young Tias, who was enjoying himself immensely in the middle of the park (just to be clear, by playing football, not by sipping a beer or listening to his ipod), who thus joined TNA in scoring a fine hat-trick.

Despite TT’s heroics, the defence conceded two further goals to leave the final score at a remarkable 10-3.

The most noteworthy incident of the second half, however, was not a goal. Kind of the opposite in fact. After some fine work involving Tias and Marc down the left, TNA squared the ball to TOA/TNT, who was presented with a tap in from all of two feet. Feeling sorry for the keeper, and not wanting to end up with a score more appropriate to cricket than football, TOA managed to scoop the ball over the bar, much to the amusement of the small boys clustered behind the goal, who in your correspondent’s opinion really should have been concentrating on their mini-rugby tournament and showing a bit more respect to their elders.

After the game we all agreed two things. First, it’s been a remarkably warm Autumn; and, second, Steve will really struggle to get back in the side.

© 2011 Kenchels FC, all rights reserved. For more information contact support@kenchels.com.